My Southwest Quesadillas

My blog is still here?!?!

I am actually a little surprised I remembered the right password on the first try!

I know I've really dropped the ball on this whole blogging thing... and all both of my readers are probably gone now but I'm still attempting a come back. Maybe since I'm posting an awesome Quesadilla recipe I will be forgiven my long absence.

Just a quick update on where I've been and then on to the food.
The last 4 months of my life have been consumed by college.
I DO NOT remember it being this demanding.
It is a serious pain in my butt.
I'm such a masochist that I signed up for 2 summer classes.
Seriously, I need a mental evaluation.

On the weight loss front things have been okay.
Alright, alright they have been pretty slow lately.
I did however finish my very first 5K. In March.
How did I not blog about that? College.
Hopefully I will get a post about it up soon!

Anyway here's the food!

My version of a Southwest Quesadilla
Each one only had 552 calories and I used full fat cheese... which was amazeballz.
Mine had taco meat but you could easily omit that. 

Sour cream not included in calorie count

Below are most of the ingredients, not pictured are the tortillas and beef.  

You will need to drain and rinse the beans and corn.

First I browned my meat and drained it really well. I used 80/20 because I had it in the freezer but feel free to use lean ground beef or ground turkey. These would also be wonderful with fajita beef or chicken!

After draining the beef I added some taco spices. I make my own taco seasoning which is mostly cumin.
For this I mixed:
3 teaspoons cumin
1.5 teaspoons garlic pepper (found at Sam's)
1/2 teaspoon paprika
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1/4 teaspoon red pepper flakes
1/8 teaspoon ground cayenne pepper

Obviously I taste as I go and add more of each depending on the flavor I'm looking for. Once you add the spices let them toast for about 30 seconds to develop the flavors a bit more.

Next I sauteed my mushrooms in 1 tablespoon olive oil.

Once they release their juices and look like this you are good to go!

Transfer the mushrooms back to their bowl and saute the garlic in 1 tablespoon olive oil for 30 seconds.

Be aware garlic burns very easily so watch the clock!

Next you will add the spinach and cook it until it has wilted.

Before...

And after. This is also a great way to prepare spinach as a side.

Before assembling the quesadillas you will need to mix 1 cup of the corn, 1 cup of the beans, and 2 cups of the meat together.

Also separate the spinach and mushrooms into 4 equal servings.

Dividing it into fourths makes it easier once the cooking process has started.

 

After moving everything close to the stove, heat a large cast iron pan or griddle over medium high heat.
Spray with a good amount of cooking spray and coat each side of a 10 inch tortilla.
Let the first side brown keeping a close eye on it.
After flipping it spread 1/2 cup of the cheese mixture over the whole tortilla.
Then sprinkle 1/4 cup of the meat mixture, 1/4 of the mushrooms and 1/4 of the spinach over one half of the tortilla.

Almost there!

Once the cheese has had time to melt fold the tortilla over to make a half moon shape.

Yum!

There is no need to flip since you let the cheese melt while it was laying flat. Which means you don't loose your filling.
Continue this process until you have 4 finished Quesadillas. 

Move to a plate and slice into fourths!

Enjoy with sour cream, jalapenos, rice, beans, guacamole etc.... Or a big margarita!!!

Southwest Quesadillas

Ingredients:
1lb lean ground beef
taco seasoning (see above for my recipe)
2 ounces pepper jack cheese, shredded
4 ounces monterey jack cheese, shredded
2 ounces cheddar cheese, shredded
3 cups fresh spinach
4 cloves garlic minced (I use a grater to mince it)
8 ounces mushrooms
4 10 inch tortillas
1 cup corn
1 cup black beans
2 tablespoons olive oil
cooking spray

Remember I used full fat cheese, if you are looking for a place to cut calories start there. Also there was enough of the meat mixture leftover to make 4 more quesadillas with just meat and cheese which tasted great. If you don't want to make 8 total, half the amount of meat you use or double the spinach and mushrooms to make 8 of the original recipe.

Enjoy!

Taking the First Step

Why should you take the first step?

Because you are worth it.

People ask me all the time what my breaking point was. I don't really know. Kinda dumb since my blog is about my Ah Ha moment. All I can tell you is that there were so many moments I couldn't count or remember them all. And I don't want to. While I do think it's necessary to remember never to be that person again, I hate thinking about how awful I looked and felt.

How do you take the first step. I don't have a clue. But you do.

Everyone is different therefore everyone's journey is going to be different.

One of the awesome parts of losing weight is getting there.
Finding yourself again along the way. 
I didn't even know how lost I was.

People your self image can make you or break you. I honestly wish your jean size didn't matter but it does.
It matters to your husband, your kids, your boss or future boss, your in-laws, the people crossing the street, and it matters to YOU. 

Which is why it matters to everyone else. If people are meeting, seeing, and knowing someone who isn't comfortable in their own skin they aren't really getting to know you. They are getting a watered down version of you. Maybe someone who was once outgoing and funny that now is quiet and reserved (that never happened to me by the way) but that's certainly not to say my weight didn't effect me emotionally. I fought everyday to get out of bed and get things done. I had quit living and I didn't even realize it.

If you are struggling with your weight and you know it is keeping you from living the life you want to live don't wait to fix it. It is so incredibly worth it.

I ran 2.25 miles yesterday in 25 minutes.
I no longer have a BMI that is categorized as obese.
I have the energy to play soccer with my baby.
I can keep up with college students (and out run their asses).
I WANT to live again.

Do you?

Training In Progress

Training (aka Killing Myself Slowly) In Progress

Okay, so maybe I'm being a little dramatic. I am enjoying the training process as much as possible (which isn't much) but I am extremely proud of myself.

I have officially registered for my very first 5K WHOOP WHOOP. Which is the reason I have put so much effort into training this time. I never imagined the way this would make me feel. I don't think anything so far in my weight-loss journey has made me feel so empowered.

Running in the Rain, see I'm devoted!

Recently I have changed things up a bit and I am seeing the pounds melt away. Shaking things up always helps! Instead of counting every calorie and stressing about staying under my "goal" for the day, I have been focusing on eating super clean. I am still drinking two shakes a day, one at breakfast, one at lunch along with a small healthy meal. Then the Hubbs and I are juicing for dinner :) Oh what fun that is!!!

Carrot, bell pepper, apple, celery, radish, cilantro, kale/spinach, tomato, turmeric, and ginger!!! This has been my favorite so far!

Mmm Mmm Good (I feel like if I keep saying this sooner or later I will believe it). On the upside I have T.O.N.S. of energy. I feel so good it makes choking the juice down worth it...

We have also been doing a Fab Abs challenge (Lane is having so much fun with this...heavy sarcasm). I have a shit-ton of core strength left over from my days as a base in cheer-leading. I can hold a minute plank after not working out at all for a year without blinking. (<-- Was that a run on sentence??? I suck at grammar) Oh well hopefully y'all get the point. I have abs of steel hidden under 20 or so pounds of fat, I freakin' rock...(modest much?) The Hubbs, not really. He has Z.E.R.O core strength and endurance. Love him to death but the man could barely hold a 5 second plank when we started. 11 days in and he is going strong at 30 seconds! So proud of him ♥ It has been so much fun to watch him get better at trusting himself and pushing harder. He has no idea how much easier he has made this whole process on me by participating. I know he hates every minute of it but that's the kind of love we have! I am so blessed to have him. 

This is the Fab Abs Challenge we have been doing. Try it out!!!

Okay that was enough gushy shit to last a lifetime, right? But seriously I love that man like I used to love cake! 

Next week I am going back to college... GULP. I am enrolled in a whopping 15 hours. Holy crap shoot me in the face why don't cha. The good thing about my increasingly crowded schedule (meant to be pronounced like the British do, now say it again the right way) is that I will have access to a gym again. I have many torture workout sessions planed in my near future. Plus I will have an hour to kill each day in between my last class and picking up my nieces from school. God has a sense of humor :) 

Hoping for a bikini bod by the end of 2013... Now it's time to work for it! Who's with me?!?! Let's make 2013 our BIATCH! 

Ready, Set, Go!

Great Things for 2013

Looking Back

Left was taken in 2010, Right was taken just a few weeks ago. Those pants are a size 24 that is a 5 size loss.

I am so proud of myself. I know I may sound conceited but I really just don't care. I have taken huge steps toward living the life I am meant to live this past year. It has been a long time in coming but I wouldn't change a thing. 2012 taught me some great lessons and I am so excited to put them to use in 2013!

My niece RaeLeigh and I at her first concert!

I uploaded this picture to facebook and I realized something important. I no longer feel the need to hide behind other people when I am in pictures now. I cannot begin to express how wonderful it feels to be happy enough in my own skin, to be photographed, without feeling like sticking a fork in my eye.

I stepped on the scale December 14th and saw this...

That says 188.4 or 188.9 I can't really see it and I don't remember

!!! EEEKKK!

Why is this such a big damn deal you ask.
Well because that was the moment I had officially lost 50 pounds.
It also marked the halfway point in my journey. I sat down butt naked and cried like a baby.
You have to understand, I have NEVER before believed I could do this.
I never let myself dream of looking they way I truly want.
Until June of 2012 I didn't believe I would EVER be slim.
I have NEVER been sexy or skinny or worn a bikini BUT I WILL.
I promise I will.

230 pounds - 190 pounds

These are the latest progression pictures I have.
When I started I weighed 240 pounds, I didn't take my first set of pictures until 230 pounds, but I really believe that first 15 pounds or so was water anyway. So I feel like these represent 50 pounds of weight lost.
These pictures are why I keep going.
They are why I choked down green juice last night.
They are why I keep moving one foot in front of the other when I want to stop running so badly.
They are why I believe I can lose 50 more pounds.
They are also why I believe you can too.

Looking  Forward

I am so happy to announce my dear husband has decided to join me in leading a healthier lifestyle. He has been drinking shakes, juicing, and somewhat counting calories. I am so proud of him and I'm so happy I have a new guinea pig!!!

Us in Progreso, Mexico in January 2011

I am going back to college next week and I am so excited! I am however a little nervous about how I am going to handle teaching nights and going to school two days a week. Looks like A LOT of meal planning in my future!!!

Miss Ridlee and Mama on Thanksgiving

2013 is going to be the year I make my dreams come true. 

I will run a 5K by June and a 10K by December.
I will lose 50 more pounds.
I will wear a bikini in public (even if it's in December!!!)
I will go skiing for the first time ever.
I will make myself proud.
I will. 

Falling off of the Wagon

Hell I didn't just fall off the wagon, I left the freaking reservation. 

We all do it.
Whether it's dieting, exercising, or learning how to play the piano. We all quit at some point or another and have to start completely over.

We as humans fail. 

That's not important.
What is important is what you do when you realize you have failed. 
How a person handles failure says a lot about them. It shows if they have grace and dignity, or if they can still throw a tantrum like a toddler.

I am writing today to be held accountable for my recent actions and, or inaction.  

I have stopped counting calories.
I have stopped consistently having two shakes a day.
I have begun eating fast food again.
I have stopped exercising. COMPLETELY.
I have stopped drinking the correct amount of water I need each day.
I have had several cokes.
I have visited Starbucks one too many times here lately. 
I have become complacent.

Most importantly I have forgotten that I am NOT done.
I have forgotten that my goal is 140 pounds not 190.

I will no longer let myself believe losing 50 pounds is enough. I will get my act together and resume the journey I began in June. I will inspire others again. I will make myself proud. 

I welcome anyone to remind me each and everyday of the promise I am making right now.

I will get back on track. I will hit my ultimate goal. I will not let a few unproductive weeks keep me from achieving the thing I want the most. To be slim.

IT WILL HAPPEN. As long as I climb my fat butt back up on the stupid wagon.

The Liebster Award

Diane from Just Simply D tagged yours truly in the Liebster Award! I beginning to love this blogging thing :) 

If you have been living under a rock the past few days and haven't looked at any blogs, I'll give you an idea of what the Liebster Award is. Diane informed me that "Liebster" means favored or favorite (yep that's me).
Once nominated, each person is supposed to post 11 things about themselves. Then they are supposed to answer the 11 questions that the person who nominated them has written. At the end of my rant... I mean post I will choose (hopefully) 11 new persons to nominate that have 200 followers or less and have not been nominated before.... So here goes!

11 Things About this Crazy Chick:

1. I am a the biggest chicken IN. THE. WORLD. Really people I have nightmares after watching Scooby Doo.
2. I found my husband on Myspace. Luckily we have lasted longer than it did!
3. Our 3 year old daughters life ambition right now is to shoot zombies... thank you walking dead. (Her daddy let her watch it. NOT ME!)
4. I think Robert Downey Jr. is WAY sexier than Chris Hemsworth. Age difference be damned!
5. I have spent enormous amounts of time baking and decorating cakes. Go check out my facebook page Aunt Bea's Treats. I also teach Adult Cake Decorating Classes :)
6. I am not shy, not one tiny bit. Sometimes I wish I was...
7. I don't own any plain socks. I need crazy patterns so I can party like it's 1999 when I take my shoes off!
8. I have read every Nancy Drew book every written.
9. I love roller coasters!
10. I spend way to much time on facebook/pinterest.
11. I have re-textured and painted my entire house by myself. (I am totally out of interesting things about me)

My answers for Diane's questions:

1) Iphone or Android? Android Android Android! I NEED a back button!
2) Do you have an siblings, how many, are you oldest or youngest? I have a brother and a sister and I am the baby by more than 10 years! (explains a lot huh?!?!)
3) Do you drink any soda? If so what is your favorite? Not anymore... but it used to be Coke or nothing!
4) Do you write in cursive or print the majority of the time? I don't even know if I know how to write in cursive anymore... Pitiful I know.
5) What is a habit you wish you could break? Speaking without thinking!!!
6) If someone told you that you could see a loved one that has passed for 15 minutes, who would it be and what would you say? My great grandmother. She died when I when I was a teenager and I'm not sure I knew how big of an influence she was to me. I'm positive I never told her and I would like to.
7) Are you a list person, a coupon queen? What helps you stay organized on shopping trips? List person yes, coupon queen, not hardly! I would die without my "Out of Milk" app on my phone!
8) Do you have a "hidden" talent no one really knows about? Nope can't think of a thing...
9) Can you paint your nails on your non-dominant hand and it look good? Yes I can!
10) What is one thing you wish you could take a class to become better at? Writing HTML ;)
11) Do you say I love you to people you love before you hang up the phone with them? Not all of them.

My questions for the ladies I nominate:

1. Do you always think the book is better than the movie?
2.  Who has inspired you the most in you life?
3. If you could go back and change just one thing, what would it be?
4. If you could travel to any point in time what person would you travel to see?
5. Team Edward or Team Jacob? (I'm laughing out loud writing that one!)
6. Have you ever suffered through a bloody movie for your significant other?
7. Have you ever had the "naked" dream?
8. Do you think your vote counts?
9. If someone gave you a motorcycle, would you ride it? 
10. If you could fast forward through all of the previews you will see the rest of your life would you?
11. Have you ever baked from scratch? 

These are the Lovely Ladies I'm nominating: (please forgive me if I am nominating you for a second time and disregard the nomination) 

Meggan at Our Naturally Bare Adventure 
Jules at So Totally Life! 
Jennifer at My Quest for Personal Happiness 

I am quite honestly have a really hard time finding any other blogs that haven't already been nominated! If you haven't been and would like to participate please feel free to consider yourself nominated by me :)

Thanks Diane for tagging me! I had fun playing along :)

How did it get so bad?

230 pounds... There are no words

This is a question I seem to ask myself a thousand times a week. 

The answer is life happened. (And I am a fantabulous cook!)

I love to cook, and I love to eat even more.

What I don't love is being a fat-ass.What I really hated was teaching my daughter that there was nothing I could do about it.

Chocolate Cake, Chocolate Cheesecake, Chocolate Pie, Chocolate Covered Strawberries... Anyone seeing a pattern???

So back to the question at hand. How did it get so bad? 

In the beginning I felt like I was a recovering alcoholic in so many ways.
And I was recovering from an addiction just not from alcohol.

I was a food addict. 

Whew I said it... I was 100% addicted to FOOD.

I would find myself driving through my favorite fast food restaurants on the way home from town and ordering $15-$20 worth of food just for myself. Then I would EAT. IT. ALL. I also needed to do it while watching a show I liked or reading a book. I was trying to escape reality, the reality where I knew it was wrong to eat 3 double cheeseburgers, a large order of fries and a 20 piece McNugget while slurping down a extra large coke all by myself.

I was in denial about my addiction for a really long time. But when I realized I would NEVER have done this in front of anyone else, it seemed to click that I had a problem.

When I look at that picture above I can hardly believe that was me. I DIDN'T feel that big. I never saw myself that way.

But it WAS me. The only reason I can look at that picture without hating myself is the peace that comes with knowing, it will never be me again.

I have not eaten at my favorite spots since June 15th. I'm not saying I haven't had fast food, I have. But never at the places I used to frequent. I'm not sure I will ever be able to go back through those places and not want to eat the way I used to. So I don't go.

I can say we ate at a taco place a few nights ago and I had a really unhealthy (amazing tasting) quesadilla, and I was sick minutes after eating it. I'm proud to say my body has learned the difference between the crap and the good stuff.

I'd also like to put a little blame on my wonderful, supportive, amazing husband. He never once told me I was too fat. He never once said I just can't be with you anymore. He never quit loving me through the worst of it all. He told me I was Beautiful ever single day. Because of all of these things I love him more than words can express. He let me come to this decision to change all by myself, never pushing me to be a stick thin trophy wife (although I don't think he would mind very much). It is because of him and our daughter that I have put so much effort into being a healthier person inside and out.

 My husband (aka Big Pimpin') and myself at 240lbs in May -  My niece Gracey and myself at 200lbs in October.

 I know everyone has to have their own wake up call, and if you need one I hope it comes quickly. Life is worth living so go out and do it! Don't wait until you are where I was. Love yourself enough to take care of your body.

YOU ARE WORTH IT!